Plain Tales From the Surgery

Tea and sympathy

In these times of hi-tech medicine it is nice to know there is still a place for simple treatments.

A recent hospital discharge letter contained the phrase 'progress monitored by critical care outreach tea'.

Dr Raj Kapur, Kettering, Northants

Familiar faces
I had just started in general practice when a man came to my surgery whose name and face were familiar.

However, being thorough, I asked the usual questions to identify him: 'Where do you live? and 'What is your job?'.

I was more than a little embarrassed when he replied: 'I am your next-door neighbour' and 'I am your bank manager'.

Dr Stephen Lonsdale, Appleton-le-Moors, North Yorkshire

Both in the dark
On a late Monday afternoon surgery a middle-aged woman came to see me concerned about a mole on her shoulder.

'Is it getting dark?' I asked.

'Oh yes. I am scared of taking the dog out for his walks early in the morning now,' she replied.

After she saw my amused face we both burst out laughing and she realised that I was talking about her mole.
Dr Peyman Jamshidi, Cambuslang, Glasgow

An old head
A young mother came to see me about her two-year-old toddler, concerned that his cold was nothing worse.

Her four-year-old, who always acts as if he is going on 40, came along too.

As I examined the younger child, the big brother watched me intently. I was able to reassure mum that indeed nothing serious was wrong and she seemed to be reassured.

Then just as they went out of the room, the older boy turned to his mother and said: 'There you are, mum, it's just one of those things.'
Dr Peter Watkinson, GP locum, Chobham, Surrey

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